Coachella Valley Music and Arts Festival. Sounds fancy, yeah? For scenesters, real influencers and even wannabes, it's a three-day social media blitz. And oh yeah, there's music there, too.
My SM feeds are flooded with non-stop content from the fest held over the weekend, and while most of it's not all that interesting, I am tuning in to see the ridiculousness that is the Coachella food scene. 'Why all the ridiculousness?' you ask. Venture on, dear reader, to find out.
A Pricey Food Fiasco Awaits at Coachella
According to the Coachella website, there are more than 50 'top restaurants' from across the country that have signed up for their food to be feasted on by more than 200,000 attendees over two weekends. The Indio Central Market inside Coachella is basically a food court filled with enough vendors to make your head spin and your bank account cry. Here, you'll find a mix of slightly more elevated fare like fancy Japanese hot dogs, artisanal ice cream, and food from some pretty rad chefs like Roy Choi, in addition to more run-of-the-mill items like chicken fingers and fries. I'd be down to pay for some amazing Korean BBQ from Choi, but some of the other reports coming out of Coachella look like the food options are not as phenomenal as advertised and are, in fact, pretty weak — which is disappointing, considering general admission ticket holders are already paying $500 (plus fees) to attend the three-day event.
Social Media Shares All
Social media is buzzing with Coachella veterans sharing their festival food hauls, and let me tell you, it ain't cheap to eat at Coachella - like $64 for two average-at-best-looking breakfast burritos and a cup of cucumber juice. Sixty. Four. Dollars. I'll wait for that to sink in - I think I actually need a moment. For $64 my burritos had better be wrapped in tortillas pressed from the rarest grains on earth, sauced with unicorn tears, and offer my friend and me a complimentary financial consultation on how to stretch our remaining festival funds.
@jackietanti $64 for two burritos and cucumber water !! #coachella2024 #coachellacarcamping ♬ original sound - jackie tanti
Coachella VIP Foodie Delights and Disasters
A VIP ticket will get you the same overpriced food with a side of exclusivity. These fancy folks get access to all the same vendors us regular folk do, plus a few extras, like Prince Street Pizza that served up a spicy, Sicilian-style square drizzled with hot honey. The VIP area is also home to Bang Bang Noodles, MìLà, Love Hour, and Samra Origins, a collab between The Weeknd and Blue Bottle Coffee. TikTokker @karissaeats posted her top eats from the VIP area, which included a paper cup of Bang Bang noodles for $28. Her biggest disappointment, she noted, was a $24 bahn mi, which was pre-made and served dried out in a paper bag.
@karissaeats Sparkly pink Caesar salad ##foodie#fyp#coachella ♬ The everyday life - nightwalker
Coachella Food Prices Will Make You Want to Pack Snacks
Let's be real - these prices are enough to make you want to smuggle a PB&J in your tube top, but that's a whole 'nother sticky situation. Unless you're planning to solely exist on $8 Coca-Colas (did I forget to mention that?) for the second weekend of Coachella, you're likely going to have to shell out some fairly serious cash for some potentially mediocre grub. Once you're there, you're sort of out of options. As our girl @jackitanti pointed out, "Capitalism is crazy and I am part of the problem." For your sake, dear festival-goer, I hope the music makes it all worth it!
