Ah, St. Patrick's Day. A time to celebrate all things Irish and to stuff your face with questionably colored food and beverages. But hey - who am I to judge? You do you, boo.
Want to navigate through the emerald abyss of St. Patty's Day deals? Here's your guide to getting the most from the green-tinted gauntlet! We're separating the genuine gold nuggets from the leprechaun-sized lumps of marketing coal.
Krispy Kreme: Come into the store wearing green from March 15-17 and get a free donut. Easy enough, unless you haven't done laundry since last St. Patty's, and everything you own is suspiciously beige.
Dairy Queen: Now through March 18, If you're a Dairy Queen rewards member, this one's for you. Check your in-app offers for a free mini Blizzard and celebrate St. Patrick with a Mint Brownie Blizzard.
Raising Cane's: For more than a decade, this crazy chicken joint has offered rewards members the same reliable deal to celebrate St. Patrick's Day. Now through March 17, rewards members will receive an offer for a free 22-oz. Leprechaun Lemonade loaded onto their account.
Dog Haus: Feeling adventurous? Dog Haus is bringing affordability to the party at its 96 locations across the U.S. with $6 green beers. Add a Jameson Pickleback shot for just $7. Just don't blame us if you wake up speaking Gaelic and wearing someone else's green top hat.
TGI Friday's: Feeling fancy? Grab a "Lucky Smash" cocktail for a mere $7.77 - because nothing screams "sophisticated Irish celebration" like a drink with a punny name.
Hooters: Snap up a plate of wings and fries for $16 on Sunday, March 17! Perfect for fueling your pre-parade shenanigans (or post-parade nap, no judgment).
Bar Louie: If you're just here for the drinks, Bar Louie's got you covered. From March 15-17, get $5 pints of Guinness, $4 Jameson Irish Whiskey Sidecars, and $3 drafts of Green Beer.
Bennigans: If Beer Cheese Soup, Corned Beef and Cabbage, and Green Beer are your thing, this long-time restaurant chain is the place for you. Indulge in all three on St. Patty's Day and keep the good times going through April 2 with their Barney Blast promotional cocktails priced at just $8-$11.
BIGGBY Coffee: While the coffee may not be green (thank gawd), you can get your caffeine fix at this primarily East Coast coffee chain on March 17 with a BOGO on any two drinks up to 24 ounces. Only need one bevvy to boost your morning buzz? Take $1 off a single cup.
Kona Grill: From now through March 17, the decidedly American-meets-Asian themed menu will also be cashing in on St. Patrick's Day shenanigans with happy hour deals that include Green Beer, Sake, and Seltzer Specials for $3, along with Corned Beef Sliders for $6.
Abuelo's: Avocado Cream Dip has returned for $4.99 through March 18. You can sign up for My Abuelo's Rewards ahead of your visit to bank $5 and it'll be like getting it for free.
Beef O'Brady's: Get your kicks with a special St. Patty's menu of classic Irish pub fare: Shepherd's Pie ($10.99), Fish N' Chips ($13.99), the Dubliner ($13.99) and Original Reuben ($12.49). What more could you want from a joint that's got beef built into the name?
STK Steakhouse: Lil' Corned Beef Sliders for $6 during happy hour? Sounds crazy similar to the offerings at Kona Grill...because, surprise! They're owned by the same company! But hey, who doesn't love tiny, fancy versions of classic Irish pub fare?
McCormick & Schmick's: Feeling classy? Check out their $7 happy hour specials that include Guinness fish and chips, corned beef sliders, Guinness steamed mussels and corned beef and cabbage. And because nothing complements a cold pint of Guinness like a little Irish whiskey, you can add a shot of Jameson to your beer for $7.
Pace yourself, friends. St. Patrick's Day is a marathon, not a sprint. And at the risk of sounding like a nagging mother, please drink responsibly.